Chulent and Cassoulet

We got a little stewy this week.  Big, hearty one pot meals to feed us several days over. 



All in one pot before the long hours of slow cooking



Early yesterday morning, Dan took a turn, reached into his Jewish roots and made chulent.  The basic chulent is a long cooked stew containing meat, beans and barley.  The meat for it this time around was that rump roast we bought last week.  After browning it on all sides, he simply threw it into the crockpot with all the veggies and herbs and turned it on to cook all day.  Sometime in the afternoon, he added the beans and then later the barley.  He even threw in some red cabbage this time to make it more nutritionally balanced.  Heh, well maybe not so much.  But it didn't hurt it!



Breakfast!



So I had a big plate for dinner and I woke up wanting more so I ate some for breakfast.  I love this stuff.  Rich, slow cooked pots of stuff where all the flavors have had time to really come out and come together.  It's hard to say no to those.  This batch was actually a little more tomatoey then he's done in the past.  But that didn't hurt it any either.  It'll feed us several meals for sure.  Haven't done the math yet.  But will get to it before the end of the night.

Normally, we eat chulent with kishka when we make it.  As if beans and barley weren't enough, kishka is more carbo loading goodness in the essential form of a big dumpling - matzo meal, rendered fat and spices traditionally stuffed into a beef intestine.  It's like a big, seasoned matzo ball sausage.  The next time we get one, and we will get one, I'll talk more about it.

Earlier in the week, I'd mentioned that I had also made a cassoulet.  Cassoulet is heaven.  Another one pot meal, it's from southern France and mainly consists of beans and meat. Variation on theme really this week.  And it does vary!  It's amazing how different such basic ingredients can become totally different meals.

Ingredients for a cassoulet will vary, but traditionally, the bean will be the white bean (haricot blanc), the meats would be any combination of duck or goose, pork rind, pork, pork sausage, and mutton.  It is then further enriched with the flavors of some simple herbs, classic mirepoix, garlic and tomato.  You have another slow cooked meal that will feed an army and have them asking for more.

Mine was a variation on the theme, of course.  The meats used were half a chicken and some locally produced smoked sausage and bacon.  And I used the same dry bean mix, Dan used for the chulent instead of the traditional white bean.  Had a little bit of everything, lima, kidney, black-eyed peas, lentils, split peas, etc.  Towards the end it was covered with bread crumbs and then tossed back into the oven until those formed a browned, crunchy top.  When all is said and done we ended up with a bean filled pot of smoky goodness.  Those sausages and bacon. . . .*drools*

So, two big pots of food that we have been and will continue to eat throughout the rest of the week, with some other smaller meals made to help break up the delicious monoteny.  Costwise, the cassoulet turned out to be a whole $8.06, and we got about 6 meals out of it so that's $1.34 a portion.  I haven't done the numbers on the chulent yet, but I'll get to it before tonight.  Tonight marks the completion of one week!  So we'll do the math and see if we went over the $44+ we said we'd try to live on.

Math

So it's been a couple days, because, you know, living on eggplant lasagna and crappy chicken salad mostly.  AND I did get the opportunity to do some staging for possible job prospects so I've been out of the house.  But today we have a cassoulet in the oven working and I thought that I'd take the time while I let it cook in the oven to talk about the math.  Where do I get my cost numbers.  It's pretty simple really, it just takes a little time and effort.  And excel spreadsheets!

Left side is the grocery list, right side is the recipe breakdowns.  I'm enjoying doing it.  I'm using the skills I have that no one's ever let me use in the kitchen because for god knows what reason, even though I tell them I know how to do it, they would never trust me to break down a recipe cost.  It's another one of those "you're just a line cook" things.  And for some reason, there's this thought that line cooks don't know or want to do math or paperwork.  Well, bah. WTH?  Did you not understand my background and experience when you read my resume?  I'm a college educated, degree holding, experienced designer with an architectural background.  That's not just being an artist, that's math up the wazoo!  I can add and subtract, do fractions, percentages and measurements like whoa.  I know how to break a pound into ounces.  And I know how to use a spreadsheet and I know how to read an invoice.  And if I want to get really particular, I taught myself algebra in 8th grade, I had advanced honors courses in Trig and Calculus in high school and college.  So I think I can divide the cost of a pound of celery by 16 just fine.  Easy math.  Thanks.

Okay, that was perhaps a touch of venting today. Hehe.

Eggplant Lasagna & Stocking Up

Yesterday was all about cooking in bulk.  For two reasons.  One, so I don't have to cook everyday and every meal and two, to use scraps.  The first project was eggplant lasagna.  Still thinking veggie meals.  Have a few planned to help balance out our already mentioned recent meat overabundance.  Eggplant is a great vegetable to use as a substitute for meat in many recipes.  It can be roasted, baked, fried and stewed.  Dan makes a mean ratatouille with it and I like to use it with tofu to make a vegetarian Filipino adobo.

For the lasagna, the eggplant was sliced into half inch rounds and then was quickly browned with the barest of oil just coating the pan.  Eggplant loves to absorb oil and since I didn't want to use alot and have my lasagna be too oily, I just put in enough to coat the saute pan.  Then it was simply one of the layers in the baking pan along with pre-cooked lasagna noodles, ricotta mixed with egg, mozzerella cheese and tomato sauce. 

The tomato sauce was just a store bought jar.  Frankly, it's too sweet of a sauce but we're going on the 'beggars can't be choosers' mentality on this one.  I tend to be a label reader too.  So at the very least I pay attention to whether or not the sauce I buy is full of ingredients I can understand and facts like the carbohydrate type and sodium content.

Covered in foil, the lasagna was baked in a preheated 375 degree oven for 30 minutes, then the foil was removed and more cheese was layered on top and it was put back into the oven until the cheese was browned to my liking.  We've cut the pan of yummy lasagna into 8 portions, which will be eaten for various meals over the week.  That's 4 meals for each of us assuming we share equally.  Total cost is $7.39. that's $0.92 per portion.  Better believe it!

So I also made some chicken stock.  One of the things culinary school taught me is that it's always good to make your own chicken stock.  There are some decent BROTHS out there in the market.  I personally like to go to Whole Foods for broth when I need to.  And still would even on the extreme budget we're on.  Sounds crazy, right?  I mean, it's Whole Foods.  They are a huge promoter of selling healthy and organic and environmentally conscious products, which I like, but they tend to be on the pricey side.  Tend to be.  They have a few products that are worth going there for because, surprisingly, they're cheaper than anywhere else.  One of those things is their 365 Everday Organic Broth.  I always get the low sodium.  And it is cheaper than any other broth I've seen at a regular grocery store, it's lower in sodium, it's organic understandable ingredients and it tastes good.  But I've digressed.

Chicken stock!  Make it!  Why?  It's economical and easy.  It uses scraps, in this case the raw bones from whole chickens I'd used previously in the week and had stored in the freezer.  You get to control the sodium content, meaning there's none added to it to begin with.  You can add what you want later when you use it to cook.  The bones provide gelatin, something lacking in most store bought broths.   Gelatin gives homemade stocks a mouth feel to your soups and sauces that you can't get from a broth.  In general, you just know what you put in it.  All that's in a basic stock - chicken bones and pieces like chicken wings, carrots, celery, onion, peppercorn, bay leaf, thyme parsley and alot of water.  Throw it all in a big pot and let it simmer for a minimum 3 hours.  I ended up with 3 quarts of reduced stock, useable in the future.

And then there was the bonus.  As I was pulling the chicken carcasses out of the pot last night to strain the stock, I noticed all the little bits of meat still on the bones.  Now granted, most of the flavor has been pulled out of them, but I needed to try anyway.  So, after I had strained the stock and put it back on the stove to reduce (something I do just so it doesn't take up as much storage space), I sat down and picked all the meat off the bones.  I then made a simple chicken salad out of it adding mayo, mustard, honey, celery and S&P.  I admit, it's not phenomenal.  In fact, I'd just call it edible.  People who like canned tuna or chicken, I bet they'd love it.  But, like I said, edible and once again we go back to the "beggars can't be choosers" mentality.  Going to have to acronym-ize that.  "BCBC".

And extra bonus!  Dan came home from work last night with two boxes of FREE CRACKERS!  It was kismet.  So we have stock stocked away and chicken salad to fill out the week with little snacks and meals as well, all at a total cost of $3.15.

We add in the sausage, eggs and rice we had for breakfast, and the leftover refried beans and tortilla chips we had for lunch and the total cost for the day was $12.90.  But remember!  A couple meals for a couple days!

First meal - Chips and Guac

I've been craving guacamole for a few weeks now.  But seeing $2.00 avocados that weren't anywhere close to ripe at Jewel made me balk.  We'd been going to Jewel the last few months because they were having a special offer to collect stamps to get some decent new non-stick pans for a penny.  I couldn't say no to that.  A penny!  Well, we got our wonderful new stir-fry pan and we love it.  But now that it's acquired, good-bye Jewel, at least, for now, we're headed back to Tony's.  My hope was that Tony's would be having avocados on sale, but they didn't.  But I couldn't hold out anymore.  Must.  have.  GUAC!

Half the price though and as always they had tons of ripe avocados from which to choose.  The other great thing about Tony's.  Locally produced tortillas and tortilla chips.  So two avocados and a bag of chips into the cart and into my belly last night!

Simple dinner, really.  And vegetarian.  A plus since I feel we've been eating way too much meat lately.  Guacamole and chips with refried beans.  Homemade.

For the refried beans you will need 6oz of dried beans.  It really doesn't matter what kind.  Red, white, black.  They all make a delicious refried bean.  For this particular night I used cranberry beans.  And I didn't soak them.  You don't have to soak them. Soaking them pretty much just shrinks the cooking time.  But since I was cooking this for the same day, I just threw them into a pot, filled that pot with maybe 5 times more water then beans, a little salt and then let them boil until soft.  Keeping enough water with the beans so that they were just covered, I then took the stick blender and blended them into a chunky mash.  You can blend it as smooth as you want.  I like some chunks though.  I then heated a saute pan, melted a tablespoon of butter in it, tossed in the bean mash and stirred it while giving it a quick fry.  I had to add a little water to get the proper consistancy and then gave it a taste to see if it needed more salt.  This by the way made much more refried beans then we needed, so half of it ended up in the fridge for later use.

Here's what was in the guacamole -
2 avocados
Half a plum tomato
2 oz of onion
Half a jalapeno, seeded
Half a lime
salt&pepper

The avocados were cut in half, the pit thrown out and then the meat spooned out into a bowl.  The onion and tomato were small diced, the jalapeno finely chopped and tossed in and then the half a lime was squeezed of its juice into the bowl.  Salt and pepper to taste and then smashed and mixed altogether with a fork.  The other half of the tomato was diced and with a chopped green onion, they were used as garnish.  And the other leftover veggie halves and pieces were stored for later use in another recipe later on in the week.

So there we have it.  On each plate, 3oz of tortilla chips, a portion of refried beans, half the guacamole garnished with tomato, green onion and a 2oz dollop of sourcream.  It's a fairly hearty meal for one.

I'm actually a little afraid to see what the calorie count is.  One plate alone is really enough for two people.  But we made two plates. Heh.  We may have to work on the whole portioning thing.  Having said that, this was our first meal under the "Food Stamp Plan".

Total cost per person - $1.88

Yep, need more awareness on the portioning.

$53.11

Yes, I know.  It's not $44, the magic number that we are suppose to feed ourselves on each week.  But the hope is that the $53 worth of groceries we purchased today will stretch us for more than a week.  And we can use some of the items to carry over into the following weeks.  Like we won't be using the whole box of pasta in one night.  Or the bag of tortilla chips.  And that rump roast.  That'll get cooked and feed us a few meals on its own. Yes, a rump roast.

What?!  Beef!  Pricey!

Not so much.  Sales and knowing where to shop.  Is it a Prime Angus cut?  No, of course not.  And since it isn't, what do we do with it?  We braise it, slow and long.  And it will be delicious.

As for price, there's a great advantage to living in Chicago.  Variety.  Culturally and economically.  That lemon that costs $1.00 at the big box brand name grocery store, costs $0.50 at the local chain grocery store marketing to a more hispanic crowd.  It was actually $0.25 a piece this week.  Yay, sale.   That rump roast that's $6.50/lb at the big box. . . .$1.99/lb at the local.  Also on sale.  Is it a good piece of meat, you might ask.  Well being a professional cook by trade, do you think I would buy bad meat?  Yes, I have seen bad product at some of these local chains.  Today we saw some corned beef selling for $1.69/lb.  But it was also double wrapped in plastic wrap because the vaccuum packing wasn't vaccuumed anymore.  Yep, definately did not buy that.

For the most part, the products sold at the small chain are of decent quality.  They just don't have the same type of overhead the huge chain stores do.  They don't have the variety that the huge chains do.  But really, do you need to have the choice of 10 different corn flake cereals in one place?  Also, catering to a more ethnic demographic, these smaller stores can buy things like the produce their shoppers tend to want in much more bulk.  At Jewel they have a small pan of jalapenos on the shelf.  At Tony's Finer Foods there's a box of them big enough to sleep in!

Chicago being the diverse city that it is, there are also alot of local producers of things.  And they don't charge the huge prices that some brand name, higher quality products do at more fashionable markets.  But I guarantee you there is so much quality put into what they make.  Polish butchers that smoke their own kielbasas.   Korean markets that make their own kim chee.  Or how about Arabic bakers that make delicious, fresh pita daily.  I know a place that I fell in love with and I can't ever buy pita anywhere else now.  At the very least, not the ones at the chain grocer.  Because not only is it soft and fresh and tasty, it's only $1.00 for 8-10 pieces, depending on the size you get.  So much better than that $2.50 for 6 mass produced, preservative laden, fluffy circles you get at the big box.

Where ever you live, don't be afraid to see what those smaller shops have.  Explore a little beyond the very convenient big box grocery store in your area.  I'm not talking about places all the way across town.  Though if you hear people say good things, it might be worth a trip one day.  Far travel means time and more money spent on gas.  But there may be that place you pass all the time that you just never went into before because the giant store has everything in one big place.  Maybe you have a certain concentration of ethnic population nearby that has stores that cater to them.  You should check it out.  They might have something awfully delicious and awfully well priced.

The Food Stamp Challenge!

Yep, I've applied for food stamps.  Supplemental Nutrition Assistance Program (SNAP), for those who need to know.  Hate the idea.  Hate it.  I want to be the person feeding the hungry, not the hungry person.  But I've crossed to the other side out of necessity.  We pray that necessity doesn't last too long.

I am a single person, with no money in the bank, now receiving unemployment, with rent, utilities, and medical bills to pay.  In a couple weeks, if things don't look up, I will be applying for federal assistance to help pay the utilities. . . . .hate it!  So, given these circumstances, they did the math and I get to try and feed myself on $3.15/day provided by the state government.

I accept the challenge!

Now, admittedly we are not starting from scratch.  I do have some things in ye olde pantry including basic sundries like oil, flour, sugar, salt and spices.  Rice, beans and potatoes.  And a whole chicken, some sausage and garlic and onions.  So not starting from scratch.  I go on the assumption that people in a similar situation such as I are not starting with a totally empty cupboard.  But any future grocery shopping will be based on $3.15/day per person.  That would include my boyfriend who lives with me, so a total of $6.30/day.  That's $44.10/week.  Ouch.  That's just  a little more than half of what we usually spend, and that was also on the assumption that I got at least one free meal a day at work.  Perks of working in a restaurant.

Okay.  $44/week for two.  Can we live a cheap and relatively nutritious diet on that?  We're about to find out.

Unemployment

I mentioned it yesterday.  Exactly two weeks ago today, I became unemployed.  Long story short. . .actually it's a short story. . .I was cut from the budget which was suffering pretty badly.  They decided to skin some from the 'top'.  And since I was the highest paid cook, responsibilities and seniority be damned, I got chucked.

Slightly bitter, but not really angry at all.  It's business.  It's the economy.  Whatever.  Surprise and fear are the more overwhelming.  Yes, I was surprised.  I'll be honest, I knew someone was going to lose their job in the kitchen.  I didn't see the hard numbers.  But being there day to day and doing the weekly ordering and inventory, I could see what was happening.  But I didn't think it was going to be me.  Mentally, I was preparing to have to adjust to doing even more work with less people.  And I've never been fired before.  I've always been retained while others have been sent away.  I'd always been considered valuable, well, by most.  At least valuable enough to take advantage of.  Haha.  It is an unexpected and grim reminder to always keep in mind that no matter how valuable you think you are, you can always be replaced.

I'm over the surprise.  What's left now is the fear.  This came at the most inopportune time because I have no money in my pocket.  What cushion I had disappeared this year in unexpected medical bills.  I was budgetting hard, saving small increments in order to buy a new computer which I really needed.  I had just managed to put that computer together for only $450 dollars, bought piece by piece taking advantage of sales and rebates over a two month period and built myself.  I was very proud of my DIY purchasing prowess.  Not having any other big expense plans, I was looking forward to slowly building a savings again, assuming no big surprises, knock on wood.  SURPRISE!  Should have knocked harder.  I got laid off.  Right after the unpaid holidays, halfway through a pay period.  My last check was less then half of a normal paycheck and all of it has gone to bills.  So right now, January rent and bills. . .I don't know.

I'm not sitting on my duff doing nothing but being depressed.  I am depressed, and suddenly having 40+ hours of free time a week, I do find myself sitting more.  But I'm trying not to stop.  I can't let myself do nothing.  I've filed for unemployment and foodstamps.  In a couple weeks if I'm still jobless we'll see about LIHEAP.  Looking at the numbers, it's extremely bare minimum, what I can get to cover my costs.  I've asked to defer those things that I can, but some bills just can't be.  I'm going to have to depend on money from my boyfriend's part-time and sporadic temp jobs to help manage the gaps.  And the longer this goes on I'll have to turn to *gulp* my mother.

I hate it.  It's depressing.  I don't want to have to depend on anyone to take care of me.  I despise the thought that I am now on welfare.  I've lived so many years being self-reliant.  It's hard on my ego.  I thank god, however, that my ego isn't so strong that it makes me stupid enough to not take up the necessary options to survive.

Everyday, I do the job search.  I send out emails and fill out applications on every possible line cook/sous chef job I see.  Next week, I plan on getting desperate and looking for things outside my line of work.  But, once again, I'm afraid.  I'm afraid the longer I stay unemployed, the harder it will be to find a kitchen job worth my salt.  I'm afraid if I stray from looking for cooking jobs and find something else, it too will make it hard to go back to cooking.  I want to cook.  I want to work in the restaurant/food industry.  Anything else is second best and I don't want that.  I'm afraid that the longer I'm not in a kitchen, the more my skills will fade.

And so I've made a decision.  I have more time.  I need to fill it and I need to fill it with productive things.  I can't look for jobs all day long because there just aren't enough job possibilities to fill all that time.  I've made the house a little cleaner, I've filled the dumspter alot fuller.  I've been purging.  And now I'm going to blog more.  It will give me something to do.  And more importantly, it will help me keep my focus on those skills I'm afraid to lose.  Because I'm going to focus on blogging about my daily meals.  I've found more time to cook at home and it's what I want to do when I got nothing else to do.  And the past two weeks, I've made some yummy things, I think.  I might as well blog about it and see what kind of meals I can make on such a little budget.

Dem bones, dem bones, dem . . . lamb bones

Fortune smiled upon me a few months ago.  There was this catered shindig at work and lamb loins were on the menu.  And for whatever reason the executive chef showed up with frenched racks of lamb.  He cut off the loins, used those for the menu and we were left with these.  Having nothing to do with this 'waste' there, I asked if I could take them home and then stuck them in the freezer until I could use them.  Two weeks ago, becoming suddenly unemployed and needing to try and ignore my depression by keeping myself busy, I found time to do what I wanted with them.


And what do you do with bones and meat scraps?  Why you roast them, of course.

And then after doing that you put it together with what you see here - onions, carrot, celery, herbs and tomato paste - and stick it all in a very big pot with alot of water.  Toss in several hours of time on the stove slowly simmering away and you end up with a very humid apartment and some delicious flavorful gelatinous stock.  Stock which helped make a delicious italian sausage soup, a fabulous risotto with mushrooms and spinach, and a nice portion to put back into the freezer for later use.

Brussel Sprouts Gratin

My contribution to Thanksgiving this year.

Brussel Sprouts.

Oh, yes.  And the apples.  Those went into the apple pie.  But the brussel sprouts were the demanded for request.  And that request came from my sister, who says she doesn't like brussel sprouts.  But when I decided to make a brussel sprout gratin last year on a whim (thanks to a sale flyer from Trader Joe's that pointed me to the idea in the first place) she was open enough to try it and she fell totally in love.  Everyone did, and so it was asked for again this year and my sister further proclaimed it a necessary dish for Thanksgiving from that day forward.

I think she just needs to try brussel sprouts alone and see if she still doesn't like them.  Tastes CAN change over time!  Though admittedly, unless you're allergic to milk, it's hard to say no to something creamy, bubbly and oven browned on top.  I warn you, however, the sprouts and the cheese will stink up the house good.  But it's so very much worth it.  And like any gratin, it's easy to make.

You can gratin anything.  It can be potatoes, brussel sprouts, broccoli, leeks, pasta, ham.  Doesn't matter what it is.  If it's in a casserole dish, smothered with cheese and/or bread crumbs and baked until goldern brown and delicious, it's a gratin.  But I'm writing today to tell you there are only three ingredients you need to make a delicious gratin.  Only three.  Put them with anything and you'll have an instant hit of a side dish.  The first is heavy cream.  The second is garlic.  And the third is gruyere cheese.  Not just any cheese.  Not just swiss cheese.  Gruyere cheese!  Put all three of those ingredients in a baking dish with your seasoned veggies and/or meat of choice, making sure to top it off with more of the cheese. (And buttered bread crumbs if you want.  But it's definately not necessary).  Then toss it in the oven and bake until golden.  That's it, that's all.  It's delicious!

This here, by the way, is the gratin before I put it in the oven, and lacking the extra cheese on top.  I don't have a picture of the finished product because we ate it all before I remembered I had the camera in my jacket pocket.

From Apples to Sliders

This is a post about how my brain works. I don’t know how other people’s brains work but mine is like a rabbit. It jumps. From one idea to another, from one focus to another. If I don’t fence it in, I don’t get anything done.

And it’s a smart rabbit. It can figure out how to chew through or jump over the fence, so I need to constantly move or add fences. It’s always been a rabbit and has gotten me in trouble many a time in the past and will probably do so on occasion in the future. A seeming tendency towards procrastination being the biggest thing to get me into trouble. When most of the time it isn’t procrastination, it’s just that the rabbit of a brain kept moving. For example, it has taken me half an hour to write even these few sentences because I started chatting with a friend about building a computer and a car, checked my bank account, looked at the amount of tokens I have in my Pogo.com account, started running another episode of BSG through Netflix and read about the antics of the Chicago mayoral candidates. (Yeah, I know, easy access to the internet doesn’t help fence in the rabbit. Heh)

I’ve learned for the most part how to deal with it. Never take your eye off the rabbit, pretty much. I’m constantly asking myself, “What are you suppose to be doing right now?” and “Which one of these things that you’re dealing with takes priority?” I’m just constantly prioritizing and constantly reminding myself. I make lots of little notes. You’ll find me surrounded with scraps of paper and little notebooks scribbled with words and not necessarily in any uniform pattern. But I know what they mean and where to go looking for most things I write down. I’ve learned to focus on little goals. Get this done before the rabbit thinks it’s time to jump. Now get this done before the rabbit wants to jump again. And so on.

But every once in awhile I do let the rabbit roam wherever it wants to go. When I find myself doing one of my ‘zen’ tasks and not having any immediate priorities. And I get surprising results and ideas, most of which never fully come to fruition because the rabbit starts moving again. But sometimes they do become something. And when they do, I get really excited about it.

Recipe ideas are one of those things that gets me REALLY excited. Because a lot of times it starts out in an odd place. Every once in awhile I come up with ideas and use them for weekly specials at work. One of my recently best ideas, meaning it sold well and tastes awesome, was a pork and cheddar slider with jalepeno jam. That idea started with an apple. Yep, an apple.

How does one come up with pork and cheddar sliders when they see an apple? This is how.

Hmm, two apples sitting on the spice shelf. What can I do with these apple?  It’s only a couple apples, can’t really make a meal out of two apples. I could make a jam. But that’s not a lot of jam, two apples. And what would I put apple jam on anyway? What else we got? Well, we got those ten dozen mini buns that accidently got sent to us. We also have brie. Hmm, brie and apples. Always good. But, meh, been there, done that. And too mushy. Not the right kinda mushy. And still, it’s only two apples. Not a lot. Okay, so what can I put these apples in? Jam, jam, jam, jam. Hmm, what do we have in house. . . . jalepenos? OOH, jalepeno jam! That sounds neat! And the apples can be put in to provide the pectin gooey! Yeeeahh. . .jalepeno apple jam. Sugar and spice, everything nice.  On what? Buns, you got the buns. Need to use all those buns. Too many buns. Mini buns equals sliders. Sliders with jalepeno jam. Pork with jalepeno jam. And cheddar. Creamy. Savory pork, sweet and spicy jam, creamy cheesy. WIN! He won’t go for it. (‘He’ being the chef.) How are we cooking the pork? Our typical BBQ braised? Blah. no. He won’t go for it. And I want different. And I want it to be really shredded and soft and nomnom flavorful. I want it to be like in good tacos. After all, it’s jalepeno jam. Going Hispanic with the chilis. Yeah, like tacos. Like carnitas. CARNITAS! That’ll be the word that sells it to him. CARNITAS! Pork and cheddar sliders with jalepeno jam. That would so sell!  What time is it?

This is your brain on rabbits.

Backyard Garden!

Okay, so really it's not my backyard.  I live in a multi-unit apartment building with no yard.  And my bedroom and kitchen windows face the alley.  And because of the way the streets are situated around the area in which I live, there's this huge triangular vacant lot bordered by those alleys.

See, big plot of land.  Being in a quiet out of the way place surrounded by alleys behind a bunch of residences and businesses, it's pretty useless, right? WRONG!  For one thing, there's this mechanic shop across the way.  Every summer, they voluntarily keep it mowed find junk like old stumps to use as goal posts and play soccer for about half an hour or so every afternoon.  I've always thought it utterly delightful, giving the mechanics a little bit of a break and getting some fun and exercise.  But also ever since I moved from my old apartment down the hall to this one and had a full view of that vacant lot out my window the thought has also always crossed my mind, "That would be a great place for an urban garden."

I've played around in my head about how I could possibly find out to make such a thing happen.  But at the same time have also been hesitant to take a lead on something like that, because, first off, I'm a renter and who knows how long I'll actually stay in the area and secondly, the idea just seems like a huge prospect for one lone person with really no previous involvement with the community and really no huge large knowledge or experience with gardening to begin with.  I have had small gardens in the past and grown my own vegetables, but I wouldn't call myself an expert.  Dig in dirt, plant seeds and seedlings, watch them grow.  Pick and eat!  So a bit intimidating, to say the least.

About a week ago, I look out my window and see three people in casual business attire standing in the middle of the lot chatting, taking notes, making hand gestures referring to the area.  I couldn't hear a thing but it was obvious they were talking development of the lot.  I won't lie, seeing them brought out a bit of the protectiveness in me since the awesomeness of a community garden idea had fully implanted itself in my brain.  So I got suspicious and worried.

Worried for no reason!  Today, I found yellow flyers by the mailbox saying they were putting a community garden on the lot!  Meeting next week to discuss the plans and to sign up for plots!  Sending Dan to the meeting (because I have to work that night) to sign us up.  Counting my chickens before they hatch but. . . . GLEE!  I'm gonna have a garden!

Farmer's Markets

Farmer’s markets in the city. I love them. I wish I could go to them more often. But let’s face it. The products are pricier and so they aren’t the best place to go for a person on a budget. But since I love them I do try to go a few times every summer, knowing full well it’s going to bite the pocketbook a little.


I enjoy the other benefits, which is why I go to them. One, assuming you shop to the right markets, most of the products are local and mostly organic and you’re getting it as fresh as possible. So I know the food hasn’t travelled far, is better environmentally in that respect, I’m getting hit with less strange chemicals, I sometimes get to meet the people that actually produce the food and I know my money is going directly to them and their efforts. And the variety of produce we can get at the market is sometimes much better then what you can get at the local grocery store. Sometimes we discover something new. And, frankly, it’s just a great reason to go out for a walk.

I love the seasonal aspect as well. Depending when you go, only certain things are available. Once again, it’s that getting food you know is as fresh and as ripe as possible. It hasn’t been something picked too early and sitting in a crate travelling thousands of miles while it hopefully ripens by the time it gets to where it’s going, losing nutrients while it’s slowly ‘dying’. I love that I can only get squash blossoms at certain times of the year. That heirloom tomato varieties explode in late summer. That I only have a small window of time to get fresh local cherries. That I have to wait until the end of the summer and into fall to get some of the best ‘unpastuerized’ apple cider I’ve ever had. And, if you shop smart at these markets, and purchase things that are at the peak of their season then the price difference compared to the local store is really not as big of a deal.

We never buy a lot. Always go with a set amount of cash and that’s all we can spend there. We always buy a cheese. I love the cheese. You can’t get it anywhere else. If I can, I try to go to the farmer’s market before going off for actual grocery shopping for the week. Then we see what’s there, buy what we like the best and get to plan the rest of the shopping list around it. This particular trip we got squash blossoms (I was thrilled to see those. Only one vendor had them, it was late in the year for them) which were used in a tart, cucumbers for Dan to pickle, blueberries which got thrown into pancakes and oatmeals, and the goat cheese, well that was used in a little bit of everything. Including the squash blossom tart.

I kind of wish I’d been in the mood for tomatoes. They were all over the place and so many varieties. Was that time of year. But if I’m not in the mood, I’m not going to eat them. So maybe next year. I’m also considering participating in some CSA as well next year. Will depend upon whether I can find one that will fit our needs.

My Little Brother, the Playwright

Recently my brother came into town on business. He’s a playwright. And I admit I love saying that because he is my brother and he’s actually writing plays and getting them read or produced and being recognized for it. It is a tough thing to do being recognized among the sea of artists that exist in the world. So I’m very proud of him and the work he’s put into it. I admit to also being oddly perplexed by the awe this recognition garners from other people when I mention my brother is the playwright because again, he’s my brother and I used to bloody his nose and babysit him.


This visit to Chicago is actually probably the first time I’ve gotten to experience that odd juxtaposition. My little brother, the recognized playwright. Edith Can Shoot and Hit Things is one of his newest works. It was chosen out of many plays from up and coming minority playwrights to be read at the Victory Gardens Ignition Festival this year. I was very excited about this as I’ve not had a chance to see much of his work since he’s based in New York, I actually had suspicions when reading the synopsis of the play that it referenced our lives, and it was just great to be able to see him.

Distance keeps us from seeing each other much. And Lord knows I’m not the best at keeping in touch through phone calls and other connections. So I’m not the best at communicating that I love and care for my siblings. But they are most definitely a part of me. And when I do manage to see them or speak with them, I am more than happy that they are part of my life. And I’m glad that when we get together we get along so well. I do think a good part of that attachment is because we share a unique bond because of our experiences growing up. Which is not to say we’re the only people who have been through what we’ve been through, just that we were there together and it has had a profound effect upon our lives.

A good portion of the plot in Edith Can Shoot touched very much on that part of our lives. My brother literally pulled out some of the essence of what were his, my sister’s and my teenage/pre-teen years and squished it into a two hour play. They say the best writings you do are based on what you know and this proves it without a doubt. It’s a work in progress, needs a few tweaks and some of the actors could have been better, but overall the writing did very much express the emotions and drive of the characters. And I definitely felt for the brother and sister. I understood where their words and actions came from. I knew exactly what these kids were feeling. Because I was there. I had felt those same emotions, said and heard those same words. And it was weird. Good! But still weird. I was seeing our lives being played out on stage.

And I had to constantly remind myself while watching it and during the Q&A afterwards that the rest of the audience had no idea how personal this was to me. There were definitely distinct differences between our lives and that of the characters. For example, our mom isn’t dead. And there are other things, but I hesitate to mention them because it would be giving away plot. But the emotional base of our childhood was there. I found myself rolling my eyes and laughing quietly listening to the people’s responses of pity and worry for these kids and kept thinking “We turned out just fine.” At the same time the empathy was strong. There was one specific moment in the beginning of act two that really hit me and then by the end of it I did want to cry. So even though the audience’s responses made me chuckle, I also had to resist walking out because the emotions were too overwhelming.

I did cry, by the way. When the Q&A was over, my boyfriend came to me asked me if I was alright because I’m fairly sure the look on my face was expressing something not normal. I said yes I was fine and no, I want to cry and leaned on his shoulder and did.

I know. I’m biased. But it was a profoundly good play.

Kare-Kare

Oxtails.

They are classified as offal.  Like all the guts and blood  and extremities of the cow, it's considered a throwaway piece in modern meat processing.  Recent exposure of these little chunks of meat and bone by celebrity chefs fueling the trend for wholesome and nostalgic dishes, have pulled oxtails out of the waste bin and the secret depths of grandma's stewpot.  And where you used to have to go to a specialty butcher or an ethnic market to find them and buy them for maybe $1/pound, these days you can now find them in most meat sections of the big box grocery stores at the exorbitant, trendy price of $5/pound.  Luckily, I live in the culturally diverse precincts of Chicago and the Korean market is nearby where I can get them for $2-3/pound.  Not the cheap garbage price of 10 years ago, but much more manageable for the pocket book.

These bony pieces of 'waste meat' are, in my opinion, one of the best cuts of meat in existance.  And not necessarily because of the meat itself which is tough and stringy.  Oxtails are collagen filled bombs.  It's the bone, cartilage and marrow that make these bits awesome.  The best way to cook oxtails is by stewing them.  Throwing them into a pot of liquid and letting them simmer on a slow low heat for hours.  What you get is some of the richest, most gelatinous, most flavorful stock you've ever tasted.  And the meat, which has now been sitting in this stock has also absorbed all that flavor and is now soft, tender and fall off the bone goodness.  A few pieces of oxtail can make alot of stock, and from that stock you can make stew.  And that's what I do.  I make a stew.  I make kare-kare.

Kare-kare is a Filipino stew, oxtails and vegetables in a peanut sauce. Alone it is a rich and thick delicious meal.  But it's made even better with a side serving of bagoong, a fermented salty shrimp paste that is so pungent it'll scare off alot of people with just a whiff.  But when added to kare-kare, even in the smallest of quantities, it adds that extra touch of umami that makes the dish heavenly.  Altogether, served over lots of rice, it is my favorite thing to eat.

This is my version.  This version would be the 'Americanized' style with green cabbage, green beans and eggplant from the local Jewel.  Depending on where I go shopping the day I decide to make it, the added ingredients will vary.  If I want to go more asian, I'll find me some chinese long beans and japanese eggplant, some baby bok choy or maybe okra.  Maybe go that extra mile and find some banana blossom shoots.  Toss in some tripe or add some color with annatto.

It's really very simple to make.  It just takes time since you have to stew the goodness out of the oxtails.  Normally I braise the oxtails the day before.  Season them heavily with salt, toss them into a pot of water with chopped onion and garlic, bay leaf and peppercorns and then let them simmer for 3-4 hours.  Set it on the stove or in a crockpot and let it go.  When they're finished, I'll pull out the meat, strain the stock into a container to remove all the cooked onions and herbs then put all the meat back into the stock and let it cool overnight in the refrigerator.  I don't have to do that, I could make it all in one day.  But the advantage to this is mostly me being a little health conscious.  The next day, the chilled stock has a solid layer of fat on the top.  I scrape that off and throw it out.

So then I'll heat some oil in a pot, saute some chopped onion and garlic because more is better and if I have it, this will also be where I add a some annatto oil or powder.  It gives it a more orange color which some people find more appealing.  I'll then toss the gelatinized stock and meat into the pot and let it heat back up and once it's got a good simmer to it add in the peanut butter.

Yes, peanut butter.  You could go all authentic and get some peanuts, roast them up and then crush them by hand or in a food processor, or you could always just buy peanut butter.  I usually read the label.  I take that back.  I usually just buy Jiff, Extra Crunchy.  Peanuts and sugar and salt.  That's it.  I don't buy the reduced fat stuff, I don't buy the less sodium stuff, because they throw in things like corn syrup or soybeans.  I want peanuts, salt and sugar and nothing else. And I buy Jiff because that's what I grew up on.

So I mix in the peanut butter, let it melt into the stock, toss in all my vegetables, let those cook a few minutes until cooked through, season with salt and pepper as needed and then voila!  The best stew ever!  A bed of rice, some bagoong and dinner is served.

And I also get to enjoy it for days after.  A pound of oxtails can make enough kare-kare to stretch over half a week for two people.  Not bad for $5 of meat.

Grocery Carts

You ever take the time when you're in line at the grocery store and look at what's in other people's carts?  I do.  All the time.  And then consider what it says about the people pushing those carts.  And start imagining what it says about them.  The contents can tell you if they're single or have a family.  If they're having a party that weekend, maybe.  If they think about nutrition, if they're a carnivore or a vegetarian.  If they have time in they're days or not.  If they like to cook, if they're a foodie.

One thing I've noticed in general.  People don't cook as much as they used to.  I suppose I don't need to look at carts to know that.  Eating out has increased over the decades.  I know so many people who admit they can't even cook ramen, heh.  But then you look at grocery carts and see lots of cans and bags and boxes and frozen items of pre-prepared ready in a few minute foods.  And not as much fresh meats, fruits and veggies.

I wonder what my cart tells people about me.

I know what this week's shopping haul says to me.  Sometime in the next week or so I plan on cooking the following - turkey noodle casserole (because I'm feeling retro 50's), pork chops stuffed with spinach and mushrooms, brown rice and black-eyed peas, enchilada pie with guacamole, yogurt chicken, pot roast with herb potatoes, ratatouille and . . . kare-kare.

The Carrot Cake Hunt

We've had this tradition since we've been together of getting my boyfriend, Dan, carrot cake for his birthday. We could, of course, get it anytime of the year. We could even bake our own. Who knows? We might do that next year. But getting it almost exclusively just on his birthday just makes it that special kind of special.

And while we've had decent cakes each year, we've not yet found THE cake of all carrot cakes that makes us want to go back for more. (Actually we have, but it is no longer available so not worth mentioning.)  So this year we went out hunting for the best carrot cake in town. With a list of nine Chicago bakeries in hand we cruised around the city, ended up visiting seven and came home with five tempting and delicious little treats.

(clockwise from left) Molly's Cupcake, Sweet Mandy B's,
Bleeding Heart Bakery, Bulldog Bakery, (center) Alliance Bakery

We first tried the one from Bulldog Bakery.  Yes, it did get a little smooshed during travel.  That didn't hurt the yum though!  It was simple, but in a good way.  You could taste the orange in it and the spices were not overwhelming.  It was a moist cake with decent crumb.  The frosting was sugary with the cheese flavor just hinting.  It actually made me think this is what I would get if someone's mom made it at home.  It felt homemade, and I liked that.  And at $1.75 was the cheapest of them all and a decent value.

We were given a choice of frostings at Molly's Cupcakes.  They have five to choose from, but we did go with the traditional cream cheese frosting.  The little carrot shaped sprinkles were a cute, decorative touch.  Their cake was the least crumbly of all the cakes we tried, denser and a little drier.  But it was all around a good cake.  Ginger was the flavor that stood out.  Both the cake and the frosting were not too sweet.  It was the least sweet of all the cakes we tried.  The frosting itself had the most cheese flavor of all we tasted.  That's actually what made Molly's cupcake stand out for us.  Though I actually think if we'd chosen another of the frostings, a sweeter one, it would have been a better balance.  We will have to go back and find out.

Speaking of frostings, Sweet Mandy B's was the best of them all.  It was sweet, it was cheesy.  That frosting hit my tongue and my brain just went "Yuuuuuuuuuuuuummmmmmmmmmm".  And the cake was nothing to ignore either.  It was dark and soft and moist and crumby and fell apart when I bit into it.  Sweet and nicely spiced.  Just what I love.  The one downside. . .it was too nutty.  I don't mind nuts in my carrot cake.  I like them, in fact.  Yay, texture!  And lots of different things get thrown into a carrot cake from nuts to raisins to coconut to orange peel, depending on the recipe.  But the flavor of the walnuts were so much a part of this little cake I was almost wary of calling it a carrot cake and wanted to call it a nut spice cake instead.  But if you like nuts, it's not a problem, because aside from that, it was a damn fine frosted cake.

I had hoped none of the cakes would disappoint me.  But, alas, there was the little cupcake from Alliance Bakery.  It was just bland.  And I'm pretty sure there was shortening in the frosting.  Left that sticky feeling on my tongue.  Sigh.  I won't say anymore.  Well aside from the fact that because it was the second most expensive cake we tried, it made it even more of a disappointment.

And then there was The Bleeding Heart Bakery.  No frosting, but then it wasn't a cupcake.  It was a teacake.  When we opened up the bag you could just smell the richness of molasses and brown sugar.  It was moist, it was rich, it was dense and crumbly.  It was sweet, it was potent and it was the best of all that we tried.  It was just a powerful piece of cake.  The flavor and texture were bold.  Full of spice and coconut and whatever else was in there.  But none of it dominated.  It's definately denser then I like my cakes, but it was just this mixed up bomb of rich, delicious flavor.  It didn't need the frosting.  Who knows, it might have been a ringer since it wasn't a cupcake like all the others.  But it was well worth the price, which at $3.25 was the most expensive, paying the premium for a 'green' product.

So the teacake was the best of them all this year.  Who knows what will happen next year, we might try this again if we don't make one on our own.  It was fun and I admit I was a little surprised at the variety of a simple cake.  I'm compelled to hunt for more because of it.

On a final note, I also purchased a lemon bar from Bleeding Heart.  I couldn't resist.  Lemon curd is my weakness and their lemon bar was huge!  And I'm telling you now, it is the best lemon bar I have ever had.  Pure and clean and thick and delicious.  Yes, we will indeed be going back to Bleeding Heart when we can afford to go.

The First Post

Well, here it is.  My first post.  My first blog.  At least a year, maybe more, in the making.  'The making' being me randomly saying many times, "If I had a blog, I'd totally post about this."  And so now we have it.

What is this going to be about?  Well what else would it be.  My life.  My musings on it.  The random things which make it my life.  Food.  Definately food.  I can guarantee without a doubt that there will be food.  My family, which is small and dispersed across the country.  And whom, despite my own personal failures of communication, I still love them to death and hold them dear to my heart.  My computer game habit.  Which is not huge.  I don't play many games, but the ones I do, I play with dedication.  Yes.  I play World of Warcraft.  And just those random thoughts both profound and otherwise which just pop into my head and make me wonder what other people think and do about those same thoughts.

Doesn't sound too complicated.  Yep.  Sounds fairly basic.  Well, we'll see where it goes!

I would just like to add as a last note a thank you to my boyfriend for inspiring me to finally take that first step and do this.  Said inspiration will follow shortly.