Loud and Proud

I know.  It’s been forever since I posted anything here.  But I felt the need to write something today.

I'ma tell a story.

It was the late 90s.  Driving down a bumpy, country dirt road on fall night, the tall fields of corn surrounding us and Phantom of the Opera playing from the CD player plugged into the car radio.  My brother was in the car with me and he says, "There's something I want to tell you."

I won’t lie.  I was scared.  We were teenage sibs, and it’s not like we had heartfelt talks and I could hear the tone in his voice.  It was something serious.  And he was nervous.  This was the night he told me he was gay.  My response. . . ."Okay."

And that was pretty much it.  Didn't say anything else.  Until he asked me if things were really okay.  I said yes, it was just unexpected and it needed to sink in, but it was okay.  And it's always been okay.

I wasn't some enlightened and knowledgeable person.  I was a teenager like him going through some heavy life stuff of my own and this wasn't something I had any preparation for.  He pretty much threw a Mack truck of a new world onto my consciousness.  Homosexuality was old stories in the Bible about sodomy being bad and something other people in other places dealt with.  I knew it existed but never gave it much thought.  Until that night.  But nothing really needed to sink in.  There wasn't much to think about.  Practical matters were discussed like who else had he told and how and when was he going to tell mom and dad.  But acceptance of it for me.  Easy.

He was my brother.  And he was a good, honest, smart young man.  That was all that mattered.  Nothing was going to change between us.  We were still going to live our lives like we always did.  I was still going to look after him like I'd always been doing.  I was still going to love him.  I was still going to feel joy and hurt because I loved him.  Who he chose to love wasn't going to change any of that.  I knew then it meant he was going to have to deal with things 'ordinary people' didn't.  And if they didn't deal with him well then they would have to deal with me.  But him and me, we were okay.  With me, he was lucky.  The parents were another matter.  They had to deal with it and in some ways they didn't do so well.  And they're probably still dealing, quietly.  But it could have been worse.

And I was lucky.  There are days in one's life that they never forget.  That they reflect on over the years.  That was one of those days for me.  That day, my brother gave me a gift.  He opened himself up to me in a big way and let me know him better.  And he also let me better know who I was.  I like that person.  I am proud of that person.  I am proud of the both of us.

Today is National Coming Out Day.  And that’s pretty much it.

Humba

I did not grow up with humba.  I discovered it on one of my Filipino recipe research binges and kind of wonder where it's been all my life.  I'm still working on perfecting a recipe.  But with each attempt I get closer to something I can call my own.

Humba is a braised pork belly dish originating from somewhere in the southern Philippines, the Visayas or Mindanao.  It shares a striking resemblance to Chinese braised pork belly, so I wouldn't be surprised that that's its origin.  It also shares similarities with Filipino adobo which is a more prominent dish in the northern Philippines.  What sets humba apart from the these dishes are two things - sugar and fermented black beans.

Traditionally, palm sugar is used.  A common sweetener in south east asian cuisine, it's extracted from the sap of palm trees, date palms, sago or coconut generally.  You'll find it sold as little disks or blocks in asian markets.  But you can also find it granulated (and pricier) at specialty grocery stores or food sections.  It's a brown sugar, so you'll find it light or dark brown in color.  Your regular brown sugar from your everyday market is a fine substitute, however, for any recipe calling for palm sugar.

Fermented black beans are known as tausi in Tagalog or douchi in Chinese.  They are soy beans which have been fermented and salted.  They are not to be confused with the black bean commonly used in South and Central American cuisines.  Used as a seasoning, they are very strong in flavor.  Generally found dried, they need to be soaked in water before using to wash off alot of the salt and soften them back up.  There are, however, moistened ones you can find vacuum packed.  And you can also find black bean paste.


The bean paste is much easier to find than the dried beans.  And so at the moment, that's what I use.  I do hope to be able to find the actual dried beans one day, but no such luck as of yet.  I might have to make a trip to Chinatown for it if I can't find it on my next trip to the Filipino store.  Bean paste is plentiful at the nearby Korean market, but no dried beans, which somewhat boggled me.  But, oh well.  The bean paste is a fine substitute for now.

Though pork belly is the traditional meat, this is the first time I've used it for humba.  And I've made it a few times.  The first time I used belly, it didn't turn out so well.  So I avoided it and simply used other cuts of meat while I perfected the sauce.  Doing this was helpful actually.  I realized what the problem was with the first belly.  Not enough meat.

Pork belly is a fatty cut of meat.  It's the cut used to make bacon.  Everyone's seen a package of bacon.  Those strips are just layers of meat and fat, and depending on the package, some have more fat than meat.  So that's what I had to fix.  I had to find a piece of belly that was simply just meatier.  You'll find pork belly sold skin on or skin off.  If you use the skin on, you'll want to score the skin to allow the fat to flow out while you brown it.  When I make this again, and I will make it again because I need to do it with the dried beans, I'll remember to show how I prep the belly to cook.

This is another easy one pot meal.  I season my pork belly on all sides, then on a low to medium low heat, set the piece skin side down and let it slowly brown and crisp up the surface.  It also allows some of the fat to render out as well.  Once crisp, I'll turn it over and brown the other side.  Then I'll remove it from the pot, drain out the fat, return the pork to the pot and pour the braising liquid over it.  In the braising liquid is the soy bean paste, soy sauce, vinegar, garlic, ginger, brown sugar, star anise, bay leaf and pepper and enough water to cover the piece of pork three quarters of the way.  Putting the cover over the pot, I then let it simmer for a couple hours until the meat is pull apart tender.  Once there, the pork is removed from the pot.  It's size will have reduced considerably because alot of fat has slowly oozed out during the long braising time.  Then we let the braising liquid continue to reduce until it reaches a desired consistancy of thickness.  This sauce ends up being very pungeunt and rich, caramel sweet and tart.

Slice the pork, lay it on the plate and pour some of the sauce over it.  Serve it with rice and a side of green vegetable.  We used broccoli this time around.  But a braised bok choy or green beans would work great as well. Balance the dish out with a nice veggie crunch.  You could maybe even season the veg with a little garlic and sesame oil.  Though with the rich sauce and equally rich and flavorful piece of pork, I think a simple pure clean veg side is ideal.

Chicken Thighs and Asparagus

Chicken thighs.  I have noticed over the past few years how chicken thighs have become more prolific in grocery stores. They're selling more consistantly in 'family packs' now, including boneless/skinless, and not just during the summer BBQ season.  I don't know about anyone else, but I love me a good chicken thigh.

Chicken breasts have their place.  They have 'less flavor' and so lend themselves more to a variety of cooking methods.  For example, they're far better in chicken salads then a thigh is.  And yes, technically, chicken breasts are less fatty and therefore 'healthier'.  But everything in moderation, as they say.  If you want a reduced fat chicken thigh, take off the skin and trim off the fat.  Voila.  Chicken thighs have a few advantages, in my opinion.  One, they're more flavorful.  Two, they don't dry out as easily.  Juicy chicken, yum.  Yes, partly due to the fat content.  And three, they're cheaper.

Asparagus.  Not cheap.  Cheaper when they're in season, of course.  That season might take place in Mexico in the middle of winter.  But hey, sometimes I really just need to forego my growing locavore principals and take advantage of a really good sale for something that adds healthy variety to my diet.  I am not a saint.

So what to do with a family pack of boneless/skinless chicken thighs and a bunch of asparagus?  First, you look in your fridge and see you have two slices of swiss cheese that need to be used.  So then you take those two pieces of swiss cheese, cut them in half then lay those with some cut asparagus spears in an open chicken thigh.  Wrap that thigh around the cheese and asparagus then tie with butcher's twine into a neat little bundle.  Brown them in a little oil in a saute pan then toss them in the oven at 375 for about 20-25 minutes. 

When finished roasting, serve with rice.  I eat pretty simple at home really.  At least, I think I do.  And most meals get served with steamed rice.  It's my Asian heritage.  Rice goes with anything.  Except maybe pizza.  And I suppose sandwiches.  This little bundle of joy could probably look better with a sauce.  That's my restaurant teaching kicking in.  Everything could always use a sauce to make it look better and be richer.  But for a simple meal at home the thigh is, as I said, a nice, juicy piece of meat and a sauce unnecessary.

What else can you do with chicken thighs and asparagus?  Adobo!  Well, at least with the chicken thighs.  The asparagus just makes a very nice veggie side to balance out the meal.

Adobo, in the Philippines, is basically any meat simmered in a vinegar based marinade.  You'll get arguments from various Filipinos what exactly goes in the marinade.  But that's no different really than asking people what they put in their BBQ sauce.  The primary flavoring ingredient is vinegar.  It provides sour and tart, something which is a key flavor in many Filipino dishes.  If it isn't vinegar that adds that flavor to a dish it may be citrus juice or tamarind or fermentation.

But as I said, vinegar is what makes a Filipino adobo a Filipino adobo.  The marinade for the adobo I grew up with is mostly vinegar with a bit of soy sauce, garlic, ginger, sugar, bay leaf and peppercorn.  You can have the meat sit in the marinade overnight or a few hours.  Or you can cook it right away if your needing a last minute meal.  It's a really flexible dish.  And easy to cook.  Toss all your marinade and chicken in a stew pot and turn on some medium heat.  Cook until the chicken is cooked through and the marinade has reduced into a dark coating sauce.

I admit, I take a little bit of my training into concern when I cook this now.  I usually heat up the pot and then brown the marinaded chicken on both sides first, then pour the marinade over it to finish off stewing.  Adds a bit of a prettier color to the finished product.  If I do it with chicken that has it's skin on, I'll usually drain off the extra fat that renders off when browning before I add the marinade to the pot.  I've read where some will do the opposite.  Stew it in the marinade and then take the chicken pieces and brown them afterwards.

Whichever way, whether you just toss it all in the pot or take that extra step for a little extra color, what you end up with is what is considered by many the quintessential Filipino dish.  And a dish which plays on all the different flavors a tongue can experience, sour, salty, sweet, spicy and umami.  Oh yeah! Umami!

Siopao Verse

Simple and delicious.

Siopao.

Steamed buns.

Slightly sweet.

Filled with meat.

A taste of home

Like no other.

A recipe I cannot share

Because of my mother.

It may just be flour.

It may just be sugar.

It may just be fat and milk and yeast.

But there is nothing to perfect

Except maybe the asado inside.

As for my mother's dough

Nothing compares in the least.

The 'Kids'

A little break from the recipe spree.  I thought I'd show off my current 'kids'.  They're adopted.  They're my cats.

Yes, I won't deny it.  I do call them my kids.  After all I do raise, feed, and shelter them.  I teach them, play with them, and love them.  I have no illusions that they are really my children.  They're much easier to care for than real children.  Ha.  And I try not to spoil them.  Limits on toy purchases.  They're quite happy with a ball made of paper or a milk ring.  Though we do have a few toy mice and a tunnel.  Don't think they need their own special bed or need to have canned food everyday.  We do let them catch a taste of people food once in awhile, little beggers.  And technically, they're not allowed on tables and countertops.  Though I swear these latest group seem more defiant about it.

Alright, if I'm not careful, I'll just keep talking about them.  We'll try to be brief!

This is Gandalf.  She is 'Dan's cat'.  Moved in with Dan when he moved here to live with me.  That's a very rare picture of her.  Hard to get.  I was only able to get three shots off before she got paranoid about me being in her personal space and left.  She's not sociable at all.  It took her nearly four years before she'd allow me pet her.  And even now, it's only for a short time.  She likes things on her own terms.  Most times she wants to be left alone.  She only wants attention when she asks for it.  So most of the time she's hiding under the bed or in the closet and only comes out to sit in her corner like she is now at night.  And only comes out for attention when the other cats are zonked out asleep.  She has no love for any other cat.  Though I have seen her sneak a play swat at Fiver from time to time only to hiss at her a second later when Fiver tries to respond playfully in kind.  Unfortunately for her, because she runs away from the younger cats when they bother her, they love to chase her.  These days, she's the grumpy old lady of the house.

This is the handsome man.  This is Genghis Khan Noonian Singh.  Khan, for short, and yes, we're total nerds.  Too smart for his own good, we had to buy him toys.  Never had to buy a cat toys before because I never had a cat this smart before.  If he didn't have toys he'd easily get bored and start ripping and knocking things.  Actually, he still does.  Like a dog.  Yep, I call him my puppy too.  And like a dog, he likes to play fetch.  He likes to play games.  Makes games up.  He gets extremely playful though into his adulthood he's calmed down a good bit, thank goodness.  He's a killer and a lover.  He doesn't hold back when he plays, claws and teeth ready to shred and kill.  But then rubs you to death and loves hanging on the couch with us.  He's also a carboholic.  Yes, he loves crunchy things and sugary things.  Better than meat.  He'll snub a piece of steak for the french fry instead.  And his favorite nut is the pistachio.  Really.  Pistachio.  He doesn't like cashews.

I love him to death, but he wasn't my first choice when we got him.  Had just lost my favorite cat, Ailim, to cancer just over a month before and still wasn't ready to accept a new cat into my life.  Or so I thought.  And he was a grey and he was male.  Those were two things I wasn't looking for at all.  But who says what you're looking for is what you need?

Someone had abandoned him.  Still too young to even eat solid foods, he was clean and he was healthy.  Someone had been cruel and tossed him into a dumspter to die.  But he was lucky.  Found by my coworker who was walking down the alley he heard him mewling.  He brought him to work hoping someone would know what to do with him.  I couldn't say no even though he wasn't physically the perfect cat I was looking for.

How can you say no to this face?  How can you not help a little soul in need?  And how can you deny fate?  He turned out to be the perfect cat to fill the hole in my life that Ailim had left behind.  A hole that wouldn't have been there at all had she not passed.  And there's still that little part of me that believes she might have made room for his coming.  Because I wouldn't have taken him if Ailim had been alive and healthy.  Sometimes I get this notion, he's a reinacarnation.  He does alot of things that remind me of her.  But he's still his own special self.

And then there's the newest member of the family.  That's her saying hello to Khan the first day they met.  We got her after my other old lady cat passed, Mickey.  I actually didn't wait too long before thinking of finding another cat.  Her death was easier to handle, for one thing.  Maybe I was just better prepared after losing Ailim.  But also, Khan was driving everyone crazy.  Without Mickey to help keep him occupied, he started creating havoc.  Like I said, he's smart and needs mental stimulation.  Mickey, though an old grump, helped provide some.  And so came an adoption street fair hosted by PAWS Chicago.  And from it came a little kitten they named Nicola.  She was just the right kind of active and alert when we met her.  And seeing as we were looking for a play partner for Khan, she seemed the best choice.  Our instincts were not incorrect.

Adoption agencies and guides give you all these rules about how to introduce new cats to each other.   Keep them seperate for at least a week, let them get used to each others scent, cats are very territorial, etc etc etc.  In general, they aren't wrong.  And I've heard the schpeal many times.  Most of my cats were shelter adoptions.  And I followed those rules in the past.  But with these two, I threw all that out the window.  I have a pretty good handle on how my cats think.  So the first day, they met each other.  And within 24 hours they were like this.

 

Khan instantly became a caring big brother. And now the two of them are the best of friends tearing the house apart with their playful antics. When she was little, he would be gentle with her when they played.  Now that she's grown, neither holds back.  They are equally matched. One does not rule the other.   And I can't keep anything breakable out. Ha.

We renamed her Fiver, after the skittish, prophetic rabbit in Watership Down.  She's aptly named.  She pounces and hops around the house like a bunny.  And she's a spaz.  She'll go tearing through the house at the slightest provocation of surprise.  She can't always land on her feet perfectly and she tumbles alot because she doesn't know how to stop herself.  She's clumsy.  It's adorable.  She loves drinking out of the bathroom tap.  It's routine for her to run to the bathroom everytime we get up because she wants to drink out of the tap.  She's playful.  She's expressive.  And did I mention she's adorable?  And this is her wondering if I'm going to yell at her for staring at the plant below her.

Those are my kids.  They remind me to keep things simple and to keep loving.  I don't know what I'd do without them.  Probably make babies of my own.  Heh.

Lumpia Shanghai

Above are the components for a popular Filipino bite.  Minus the canned soy milk. That's just there because I wanted to drink it.  Other than that, we have a meat mixture, spring roll wrappers and some egg wash.

There are two dishes that most non-Filipinos know when it comes to Filipino food.  One is adobo.  It's hailed as the national dish of the Philippines.  The other is lumpia shanghai.  The name tells you straight off that it is an imported food.  Very common item among asian cuisines, fried eggrolls, so not surprising it's a known favorite among Filipino food as well.  Lumpia shanghai is a long, cigar-sized egg roll, its skin tightly layered, thin and crispy.  It's fried.  And as we all know, everything fried tends towards tasty good.

The meat mixture is pretty simple.  You've got finely chopped onions, carrots, and garlic.  Season it with salt and pepper.  Mix that all up with the ground meat which can vary.  Ideally, I like to put a combination of ground pork and shrimp.  I love it with shrimp and may just go ahead and use it next time.  Several reasons prevented me from using it this time around, one of those being expense.  So this verion is just pork.  But pork alone works just fine.  My advice though, if you are using only pork, is to make sure you purchase some pork with a decent amount of fat in the mix.  The pork I used this time around was actually not very fatty at all, so the texture was a little drier than I had hoped.  Not bad, just not as juicy and textural as I like my lumpia filling.

Wrapping into a roll is pretty simple too.  The one thing that perhaps is the most difficult is deciding how much meat to actually put in each roll.  Somewhere around 3-4 tablespoons is what I put.  I've decided it's actually a little too much.  A little meat goes a long way in these little cigar shaped rolls so once again, next time I'll use a little less.  And I'm not even going ot bother telling you how to wrap it, I'm just going to show you.

The wrapper itself, you can find at most asian grocery stores.  Take note that not all spring roll wrappers are alike.  Each one, after frying will be different.  Some end up smooth, some with a more bubbly texture.  Thicker, thinner.  Some brown very dark, others not so much.  They all work.  Just experiment and find the one with the texture you like.  The Spring Home brand I used this time around ends up smooth, thin and golden when fried.

Rellenong Talong

Rellenong talong is stuffed eggplant.  My other pride and joy of the week.  The first time I attempted to make this a few years back, I really screwed it up and I haven't made it again until now.  I'm kind of embarassed that I couldn't figure out how to get the eggplant and meat to stick together at the time.  I even asked my mother how she makes it and from what she told me, I swear I followed her instructions.  Now a few years later and on my recipe perfection kick, a little bit of research has produced me perfect results.  Why I didn't think of this before, I have no idea.

It starts off by broiling an eggplant.  Cut in half, it's laid skin side up, then put under the broiler just long enough to allow the skin to peel off and soften the meat a little.  About ten minutes.  Once it's peeled, it can be set aside to cool while you cook the meat filling.

The meat filling is very simple with four ingredients.  Onion and garlic are sauteed in a frying pan.  The ground beef is then added and browned, followed by diced tomatoes.  Salt and pepper to taste, drain off the excess fat and then set aside to cool.

Heat up a little oil in a clean frying pan using medium low heat.  Grab a couple eggs and beat them in a bowl.

Take an eggplant half and carefully press it flat.  You can lay a paper towel over it to soak up any extra juice it seeps.

Holding it by the stem, dip the flattened eggplant into the egg, then lay it into the frying pan "skin side" down. While that side cooks to a golden brown, cover the top of it with the meat mixture.

When the first side is browned, pour a little bit of the beaten egg over the meat, then carefully but quickly flip the eggplant over and let it brown and cook through on the other side.  Slide it onto a plate.

It's great for any time of the day, breakfast, lunch or dinner.  Serve it with rice and ketchup.  I think if I were to serve this in a restaurant, I'd forgo the ketchup and actually serve it with something like a sweet and sour tomato relish or sofrito.